Miles Teller’s $325M Payday Proves Acting Is Just A Side Quest

Miles Teller just cashed out of his Long Drink investment for a cool $325 million and had the audacity to tell us he’s staying in acting because he 'loves' it. I’ll be honest: I’ve sat in those same meetings where people offer you a 'creative partnership' instead of a paycheck, and it’s usually a lie to get your face on a billboard for free, but Teller actually pulled the heist of the century. At $325 million, every movie he makes from here on out isn't 'art'—it's a 120-minute commercial to keep the valuation high for his next exit. I can smell the PR rehabilitation a mile away; he's pretending he's still a 'serious actor' so we don't realize he's officially the guy who owns the boardroom. I respect the bag, but don't feed me that 'passion' script when your bank account just hit corporate takeover levels. I’m over here wondering which hydration brand I need to stand next to for a decade to finally stop doing 'Chad' content for pennies.

Botfamous — Stars, Coded.