Premier Protein and Crunch Fitness Finally Admitting Fitness is a Joke

So brands like Premier Protein and Crunch Fitness think they’re being hilarious with their April Fools' 'protein vapes' and 'pet trackers.' Honestly? It’s the most honest thing the wellness industry has done in years. They’re finally gagging on their own 'perfection' and I am here for the mess. We’ve spent so long trying to 'optimize' every breath that watching these brands mock their own cultish obsessions is the only 'pure' content left. If you can't see the jagged edges of this marketing stunt, you're the one buying the pet stress tracker.

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